Healthy Relationships: Good for You and Your Kids – by Kimberly Miller

If you are in a healthy relationship, you know that healthy relationships feel good. They lighten our step and put a smile on our faces. What many people don’t know is that healthy relationships are actually good for you. Even more important, our healthy relationships are good for our kids.

Brent Atkinson is a neurobiologist and theorist on human relationships. He often writes about the effect the brain has or can have on intimate relationships. What I find most interesting about his work (as well as John Gottman, another great theorist on relationships), is the overwhelmingly positive – and statistically proven – effects a healthy marriage can have. In Emotional Intelligence in Couples Therapy, Atknson writes: “Developing the habits that support relationship success is probably the single most important task a person can accomplish in his or her lifetime.” He goes on to cite the statistics that happily married individuals live an average of four years longer than others, are physically and mentally healthier overall, and are less likely to be in a car accident. Parents model healthy relationships for their children. Research shows children of happily committed couples have fewer health problems, greater ability to regulate their emotions, perform better academically, and are better at handling stressful situations.

With all of these statistics supporting healthy and happy relationships – shouldn’t we all be working on our relationships all the time? Many people tune their car up every 3,000 miles and hire a personal trainer to help them work out. Unfortunately, people often neglect to “tune up” their relationships. Relationships take work . . . ideally, your relationship outlasts your primary parenting years and your careers. It is one of the most important aspects of your life – make sure you give it the attention and the work it deserves.

This week, our post was written by Kimberly Miller, JD, MA, LAMFT,  a licensed associate marriage and family therapist, collaborative attorney, mediator, and consultant. If you would like to learn more about enrichment services and fun ways to stay focused on and improve your relationships, contact kimberly at millerandmillerllc.com. Also check out  her blog and healthy relationship webinars at www.millerandmillerllc.com.